Being married to a beautiful Thai lady myself, I’m often asked by fellow Westerners: Why did you marry a Thai woman? Why is a Thai woman better than a Western woman? What’s better about Thai women? Can you even communicate with Thai women properly? Well, of course love has a great deal to do with it and, yes, we communicate just fine thank you, but also there are numerous benefits apart from the obvious, such as they never seem to age. In this article I’ll attempt to expound on some of the more important pluses in being married to a Thai lady.
Here are some of the traits of Thai women that endear them to Westerners like myself.
- Thai women are fiercely loyal to their husbands and family
- They have great cultural equanimity
- They are “down to earth” with great powers of reasoning
- They are doer’s and typically lead by example
- They are excellent homemakers
Family is one of the most important things in Thai society. Because of this having a strong family is of great importance to Thai women, (having said that, today many Thai women are choosing careers and travel first, then thinking about a relationship at some future date. A noticeable influence of western women’s values is changing the attitudes of many (especially) middle-class women (see also Why Middle-Class Thai Women Choose Foreign Partners). Still, having a hardworking and loving husband means the platform for a happy family life is set. Try to disrupt that environment and you’ll meet the lioness in your lady.
No matter how much she might berate or chastise you (behind closed doors of course), outside the home she will always talk you up to others, like how good at providing you are, how loving you are, what a great help you are around the house, what a great Dad you are to the kids and so forth. In fact because western men do indeed help out around the home whereas Thai men tend to be lazy on that front, is a great draw card in our favor.
Thailand, although appearing quite chauvinistic from the outside, is very much a matriarchal country. For example there is a Mother’s Day, (and it’s a public holiday) but there is no Father’s day. Thus showing the importance of respect for one’s mother. Trust me, if you saw the way our now grown up sons cower when their mother raises her voice, you’d become a true believer.
The great many Westerners tend to uproot their Thai spouses and take them “home.” Well it’s our home, not theirs, yet because of their upbringing of tolerance, acceptance of change and the willingness to adapt to change, Thai women do indeed seem to “fit in” very easily and they are often admired for it by their newfound western friends. They can adapt because of the knowledge that life is in constant state of change and they must change with it.
This ability comes from a ‘glass half full’ approach to pretty much any situation they find themselves in.
This positivity is also something that rubs off on us westerners making us more positive and more able to be their ideal man. All in all, if you have a positive mindset then virtually no problem is insurmountable…right guys!
Down to Earth
Thai women are typically very practical and logical in the way they deal with people and situations, always looking at both sides of the story, or looking at all angles before making some sort of decision. They are also very intuitive when it comes to people. I recall many a time when doing business for the first time with someone and being forewarned by my wife that something wasn’t quite right. Naturally being a western know-it-all, I brushed her concern aside.
It took me three times of being bitten before I learned to ALWAYS take my wife along when having that first meeting. Thai women seem to have a better understanding of logic than their counterparts of the west do, and are more analytical in the way they approach issues. Emotion is removed thereby offering a better view of possible outcomes.
Doers Who Lead by Example
Thai women don’t sit around waiting for something to happen, they are very much people of action (as highlighted in the article Thai Women Top Execs). They tend to get on with things rather than waiting for someone else to do it for them, if a toilet is blocked they grab the plunger instead of waiting for you to get home from work or calling a plumber.
Similarly, if they see something isn’t right instead of telling someone that they’re wrong and trying to teach how to make it right, they themselves will perform the task thereby preventing embarrassment to the other party but (hopefully) that person or people will act accordingly out of their own volition having been provided with a good example.
Homemaking Abilities Extraordinaire
I’ve already spoken about a lot of Thai women’s desire for a strong and happy family, but they take it upon themselves that all facets of family life succeed in that respect. Although you may have your own beliefs and customs etc., Thai women, having been raised in a family-orientated Buddhist society, will strive to impart all the positives that she has learned upon you and your children (that very much includes her cultural upbringing).
This, in the case of your kids, results in well mannered, generous, unbiased, compassionate young adults. I have been complimented many times over the years by complete strangers on how great our kids are for various reasons or actions by them. It does make you feel good and no matter how much I want to pat myself on the back for these commentaries, I know that the majority of the credit goes to my Thai better half.
Aside from these positives regarding the children, your house will always feel like a home, but expect the unexpected too. Things move around in your home, change is good so don’t be surprised if the living room looks different when you get home from work one day. You’ll always eat well, another high priority for Thai women is that the family always eats healthily and enough. Even if you have a sweet tooth chances are your kids won’t figure it out till well into their teens (while chewing on a raw carrot or stick of celery!).
You’ll always be well presented, no man or child of hers is going outside looking homeless, you’ll look better than you ever did and to be honest you’ll feel good about it. And that’s just it, you will feel good and you will enjoy coming home at the end of every day because of the warm and happy home that your Thai wife has created.
Be ready to be reeducated, gents. To a Thai women, you’re a “work in progress.” You are with her so that you can be made into a better person. Less ego more compassion, less know-it-all more understanding, less noise more listening, less western more eastern. It’s destiny, after all isn’t that why you’re together?